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| Don Quijote de La Mancha and Sancho Panza by Gustave Dore |
In some ways I think I was very naive and didn't really have a plan but then that has been my life story and to date it has worked for me but not this time. Call it an age thing, call it bad luck but whatever the case a little research before coming over here may have helped me out a little to understand the way the culture and the people.
I once read a book called "Being Indian" by Pavan Varma, which gave a kind of overview of what it is to be Indian and about the country. I truly believe it would be very helpful if there was such a book for any country that you decide to travel to or perhaps live in. I know that seems a little simplistic to think that you could understand a culture and a country by reading and perhaps re-reading some text but nonetheless it would give you an idea of what you may be stepping into. And I am not advocating that the adventure be taken away, far from it because like reading about art, it is nothing like the real thing, until you step into and experience life on the ground and running.
So I have gone from one brilliant idea to another, running like an animal crazed with the scent of blood in its nostrils, thinking this is it, this is the "one" and not really achieving much so far but I am learning heaps, through trial and error that is for sure.
One of my ideas was to set up a catering business. I jumped right in and had a logo designed by an Argentinian friend of mine. My thought process was, "Well, I am a good cook I can do this, let's just get it going". And I did when an opportunity arose for me to do a job for a yoga group of 10 women visiting from Sweden near the end of last year. I spent months swatting - research and recipes like I was cramming for my university exams and in the end it was worth it. Over the 7 days I worked like a mule dragging coal from the mines cooking my menu up to a storm of thank-yous and brilliant - I just wish that I had planned my journey over here as well.
So now it is all a little quiet but in fairness it hasn't been because I haven't been trying to source more work. No I have been keeping myself busy thinking about the next creative step I can take, even with all the doom and gloom forecast about the Euro zone crises.
Now please don't get the impression that I am feeling sorry for myself, far from it that moment came and went but I have had an epiphany of sorts. Slowly over the last six months I have been emerging out of some sort of human cocoon, coming out as a totally different woman to the one that idealistically left the UK a year ago. I have realised that even with all the planning in the world you can anticipate and research only so much. The rest just happens and you have to let it, especially as a foreigner in a foreign land. You have no control.
There have been many dark moments that seem to have stretched into a void of nothingness where I thought I would never escape but with the love of some new friends and a new found self-esteem it all seems to be coming together finally.
Look there is a lot I haven't said here, some things are quite personal, right? But I need to say this has been the biggest, greatest learning curve in my life. It has overwhelmed me and taken me to places I would rather forget but I am emerging, stronger in mind, body and spirit, resolved to stay strong. This strength is propelling me to places I do not know exist yet but the arrow is pointed up and my aim is straight.
Like Don Quijote of La Mancha with his ever faithful companion Sancho Panza riding by his side, I am caught in a world of imaginings and deception, of laughter and intrigue. What more can one do in a "financial crises".
YB
